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The type of humor you use in caregiving really matters. A noteworthy 2018 study shows that, of the two paths that humor can take only one is useful. Are you relying on pointing out mistakes, asserting authority, and emphasizing compliance with your humor? Well, here’s the thing: it’s counterproductive. However, if your humor reflects values like equality, interdependence, and respect, then you’re on the right track.
We get it – maladaptive humor can be quite funny at times. But when it comes to caregiving, it simply isn’t helpful. That’s where adaptive humor comes into play. It has the power to bring people together, reframe challenges, and foster a sense of purpose. And you know what? This can make life a whole lot easier.
Having the correct motivation behind your humor is what will show you the way. Why are you going for with this bit of comedy? Who’s mood are you going to lighten? Is it to lift them up or to keep them in their place? Sometimes our frustration at the situation, our own past, or our feelings of inadequacy (about whatever) can motivate us to make maladaptive comedic choices. Notice that. Don’t judge yourself too harshly, just see the choice for what it is: unhelpful. This is the best way to make a better choice in the future. It may take time to break a bad habit of being negative. Being negative is very powerful in most cases. It just doesn’t have any positive power in dementia caregiving.
Humor can lead to understanding, support, and connection. Reflect on the kind of humor you bring to caregiving, and see the positive difference positive choices can make.